Romatic break away at the Vaal Dam

Posted on Thu January 17, 2013 in Couple time.

Need a romatic break away at Vaalnest Boutique Hotel at the Vaal Dam, to spice up your relationship?
Book your romatic break away now and make time to discuss important issues to build a strong relationship.
At Vaalnest we declared 2013 the official year of providing romantic break away week ends for our customers.

American marriage councellor Mort Fertel says every relationship has a cycle.
“In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.”

He says Falling In Love is a completely spontaneous

Mort has saved marriages over the years and says after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades.

“It’s the natural cycle of EVERY relationship,” he explains on
“Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is
not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.”

He says the symptoms of this stage can vary with every relationship.
“But if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.”

He feels at this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, “Did I marry the right person?”
“And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.”

He says extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.”

He stesses the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it.

“I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully) THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT’S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.”

One of the most important things he says is:

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It’ll NEVER just happen to you. You can’t “find” LASTING love. You have to “make” it day in and day out. That’s why we have the expression “the labor of love.” Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.”

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery, he says. “There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.”

He says just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable – you can “make” love.

He advises couples to maintain Marriage Fitness with a programme for making
and maintaining love in your marriage.

At Vaalnest we can offer you a first tep in this programme: A romatic break away at our hotel will help you to make time to work on your relationship.
Read more about Mort at: