Blonde fishing jokes
It is no secret that the Vaal Dam is one of the best fishing destinations in the country. At Vaalnest Boutique Hotel we recently had a visit from a few blonde fishing experts …
The Oblivious Blonde
A blonde wanted to go ice-fishing. She’d seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary “tools” together, she made for the nearest frozen lake. After positioning her comfy foot-stool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice. Suddenly —from the sky— a voice boomed, “THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!” Startled, the Blonde moved further down the ice, poured a Thermos of cappuccino, began to cut yet another hole. Again, from the heavens, the voice bellowed, “THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!” The Blonde, now quite worried, moved way down to the opposite end of the ice, sat up her stool, and tried again to cut her hole. The voice came once more: “THERE ARE NO FISH THERE!” She stopped, looked skyward, and said, “Who are you — God?” The voice replied, “NO, I OWN THE ICE-RINK!”(Contributed by Nancy Lemon Piper)
A Brakpan blonde was walking down the street, carrying a brown paper bag. She ran into one of her friends.
Her friend asked, “Hey! What do you have in the bag?”
She tells her friend that she has some fish in the bag.
The friend says, “Fish! Well, I’ll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you’ll have to give me one.”
The blonde says, “I’ll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I’ll give you both of them.”
Mielie bom joke
There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes at the Vaal Dam to see who could catch the most fish.
Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win, they kept pulling out fish after fish.
Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what the brunettes were doing differently.
A few minutes later, the blonde comes running back. “That bag of muesli the organisers handed out for breakfast … Those girls feed it to the fish! They call it mielie bombs!”